As you enter 2026, I encourage you to ask yourself, reflect on, and then provide a behavioral response to these four questions each day. Asking myself these questions, and responding with intentional behavior, helps me stay focused on what is important and valuable in life, and clarifies how I wish to purposefully use my energy each day.

The questions are (as displayed in this visual): 

Interestingly, these questions, and my responses to them, line up with Erik Erikson’s virtues found in the final four stages of his Eight Stages of Psychosocial Development model, which span from approximately age 13 through age 65 and beyond. The four reflection questions, the corresponding virtues of each stage, and my responses to those questions are as follows:

1. Who am I? Stage Five (Identity vs. Role Confusion, ages 13–19; virtue: Fidelity):  I want my identity to reflect and demonstrate fidelity to the prosocial values and virtues that are part of my value system, such as love, empathy, understanding, esteem, respect, peace, care, and safety.

2. What is my purpose? Stage Six (Intimacy vs. Isolation, ages 20–35; virtue: Love):  I want my identity, actions, life, relationships, and encounters to be seasoned with love, because love is the best use of my energy.

3. How shall I live? Stage Seven (Generativity vs. Stagnation, ages 36–65; virtue: Care):  I want my actions to consistently and skillfully reflect the virtue of care, for my family, my work, and with anyone I encounter within the global community on my life journey.

4. What legacy will I leave behind? Stage Eight (Ego Integrity vs. Despair, age 65+; virtue: Wisdom):  I want my legacy to reflect that I lived as a wounded healer, rather than an unhealed wonder.

What are your responses to the reflection questions? As you start 2026, I encourage you to live out your responses one wise decision and activity at a time! Happy New Year to you! 

This “Wisdom that Sticks” message is based on a Wisdom Tool in Cultivating Love: Wisdom for Life, by Dr. Ken McGill

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About Dr Ken McGill

Dr. Ken McGill is an ordained minister and has been involved in counseling for more than 25 years. Dr. McGill holds a Bachelor's degree in Religion from Pacific Christian College (now Hope International University), a Certificate of Completion in the Alcohol and Drug Studies/Counseling Program from the University of California at Los Angeles and a Masters degree in Clinical Psychology from Antioch University. Dr. McGill received his Doctorate in Clinical Psychology with an emphasis in Family Psychology from Azusa Pacific University in May, 2003. Dr. McGill's dissertation focused on the development of an integrated treatment program for the sexually addicted homeless population, and Ken was "personally mentored" by dissertation committee member Dr. Patrick Carnes, a pioneer in the field of sex addiction work. Dr. McGill authored a chapter in the text The Clinical Management of Sex Addiction, with his chapter addressing the homeless and sex addiction. Dr. McGill is also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the States of Texas and California and Mississippi, and is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, through the International Institute for Trauma and Addictive Professionals (IITAP). Dr. McGill had a private practice in Glendora, CA (Aspen Counseling Center), Inglewood, CA (Faithful Central Bible Church), and Hattiesburg, MS (River of Life Church), specializing in the following areas with individuals, couples, families, groups and psychoeducational training: addictions and recovery, pre-marital, marital and family counseling, issues related to traumatization and abuse, as well as depression, grief, loss, anger management and men's and women's issues. Dr. McGill also provided psychotherapeutic treatment with Student-Athletes on the University of Southern Mississippi Football and Men's Basketball teams. Dr. McGill served as the Director of the Gentle Path Program, which is a seven-week residential program, for people who are challenged with sexual addiction, sexual anorexia, and relationship issues. Dr. McGill also supervised Doctoral students in the Southern Mississippi Psychology Internship Consortium with the University of Southern Mississippi. Dr. McGill was inducted into the Azusa Pacific University Academic Hall of Honor, School of Behavioral and Applied Sciences, in October, 2010. Dr. McGill currently works as a Private practice clinician with an office in Plano, Texas, providing treatment with people who are challenged in the areas mentioned above.

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