Something deep within tells me this just isn’t going to end very well. Would you agree? 

And so it is with the use of “The Killer D’s” (to be offset by the Empowering E’s).  The Killer D’s are words that begin with the letter “D” and describe processes that I see in my counseling office (and in my bathroom mirror) that disrupt the development and demonstration of therapeutic processes that could provide health and healing in our personal lives and in our relationships.

When practiced, these words often facilitate an outcome described in the picture and in the caption above:  the result will not be good, and upon closer examination, doom, devastation and despair, which are not on the list, are sure to be felt and experienced.

I don’t know about you, but I know there is a predator deep within my person (and I would dare say is present within some people who seek my counsel) that “wants what I want when I want it.” Unless empowered to “do the next right thing,” a concept of personal recovery, I, and possible others who may notice this characteristic within their self, may engage in cold-blooded behaviors, characteristic of the shark above.

A full list of the Killer D’s is printed below, and in“The Killer D’s and the Empowering E’s” (Part 2 of 3) we will look at how the “D’s tend to derail or “kill off” communication, connection and intimacy, personally and in our relationships.

In the The Killer D’s and the Empowering E’s” (Part 3 of 3) we will look at how certain words that begin with “E” not only serve to personally empower us, but when practiced, tend to restore “insight,” equilibrium and empowerment in our lives and in our relationships.  Most of the “E” words promote and provide life-giving qualities that enliven us and tend to enliven our relationships as well.

Even though there are parts of our selves which engage in “shark-like” behavior (behavior I hope we’d like to change), thank God we are higher-order human beings who have the capacity to not only integrate counsel but also create opportunities to effect therapeutic outcomes in all of our close encounters.

The Killer D’s

1. Denial

2. Defensiveness

3. Dismissal

4. Deflection

5. Dishonesty

6. Delusion

7. Digs and Digging In

8. Dissuade

9. Discouragement

10. Defaming

11. Diluting

12. Doubt

13. Demonic

14. Deprivation

15. Desertion

16. Deviance

17. Disease

18. Disputes

19. Debacles

20. Dullness

Please retweet or pass this post along to others if you think it would interest them, and please visit Daily Bread for Life by Dr McGill for other helpful information about personal growth.

TeleHealth/Video counseling sessions are available for those who prefer to meet online – Dr. McGill

Businesswoman presses button psychological counseling online on virtual screens. technology, internet and networking concept.

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About Dr Ken McGill

Dr. Ken McGill is an ordained minister and has been involved in counseling for more than 25 years. Dr. McGill holds a Bachelor's degree in Religion from Pacific Christian College (now Hope International University), a Certificate of Completion in the Alcohol and Drug Studies/Counseling Program from the University of California at Los Angeles and a Masters degree in Clinical Psychology from Antioch University. Dr. McGill received his Doctorate in Clinical Psychology with an emphasis in Family Psychology from Azusa Pacific University in May, 2003. Dr. McGill's dissertation focused on the development of an integrated treatment program for the sexually addicted homeless population, and Ken was "personally mentored" by dissertation committee member Dr. Patrick Carnes, a pioneer in the field of sex addiction work. Dr. McGill authored a chapter in the text The Clinical Management of Sex Addiction, with his chapter addressing the homeless and sex addiction. Dr. McGill is also a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist in the States of Texas and California and Mississippi, and is a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, through the International Institute for Trauma and Addictive Professionals (IITAP). Dr. McGill had a private practice in Glendora, CA (Aspen Counseling Center), Inglewood, CA (Faithful Central Bible Church), and Hattiesburg, MS (River of Life Church), specializing in the following areas with individuals, couples, families, groups and psychoeducational training: addictions and recovery, pre-marital, marital and family counseling, issues related to traumatization and abuse, as well as depression, grief, loss, anger management and men's and women's issues. Dr. McGill also provided psychotherapeutic treatment with Student-Athletes on the University of Southern Mississippi Football and Men's Basketball teams. Dr. McGill served as the Director of the Gentle Path Program, which is a seven-week residential program, for people who are challenged with sexual addiction, sexual anorexia, and relationship issues. Dr. McGill also supervised Doctoral students in the Southern Mississippi Psychology Internship Consortium with the University of Southern Mississippi. Dr. McGill was inducted into the Azusa Pacific University Academic Hall of Honor, School of Behavioral and Applied Sciences, in October, 2010. Dr. McGill currently works as a Private practice clinician with an office in Plano, Texas, providing treatment with people who are challenged in the areas mentioned above.


Daily Bread for Addressing Compulsion


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