What follows are 13 wise and “quick reference” suggestions and strategies to strengthen your Self, and regain trust, balance, harmony and empowerment with your Internal Family System parts. These strategies are best used in conjunction with content in these two posts about Reparenting your Self: 1. Reparenting and Loving Yourself (1.5) with the Shema, Blessing […]
(First posted on June 19, 2016) Happy Father’s Day to you gentlemen! As I contemplate the meaning of the day and some of the experiences that have come with being “Papa” or “Daddie,” here are a few things that come to mind: Father’s Day means I’ve prayed for your safe arrival, learned how to feed, […]
This Wisdom Tool is designed to be used with information in these posts: Use these 48 strategies in conjunction with the “Reparenting and Loving Others (2.0) with the Shema, Blessing and 8 C’s of IFS principles” (#1 above), and the “Wisdom Tool: 48 strategies (#2 above) to enhance your ability to Reparent yourself via Recalibrated […]
This Wisdom Tool is designed to be used with information in these posts: Use these 48 strategies in conjunction with the “Reparenting and Loving Yourself (2.0) with the Shema, Blessing and 8 C’s of IFS principles” (#1 above), and the “Wisdom Tool: McGill’s 48 additional strategies (#2 above) to enhance your ability to Reparent yourself […]
This is the second 3-part set of posts to follow the first 3-part set entitled: Please visit post #1 above (“Reparenting and Loving Yourself, 1.5”) for introductory comments regarding the need and benefit of reparenting yourself, which is the platform from which this second 3-part set about Reparenting and Loving Others (2.0) emerges. As much as […]
One of the gifts that comes with recalibrating your wisdom means you get to take the power back and choose how you wish to use your life energy to cultivate love, wisdom and healthy adult mode behavior in your life; this is truly empowering! No longer do you have to live by the “tyranny of the […]
This list of 100 Attachment and Attunement Needs is inspired by Attachment Theory and Emotionally Focused Therapy. Your goal with this Wisdom Tool is to identify then practice these behaviors to build “Earned Secure Attachments” and Attunement with each other (or your “neighbors”), as these behaviors yield powerful relationship and healing outcomes. Remember, Earned Secure Attachment refers to […]
This list of 100 Attachment and Attunement Needs is inspired by Attachment Theory and Emotionally Focused Therapy. Your goal with this Wisdom Tool is to identify then practice these behaviors to build “Earned Secure Attachments” and Attunement with each other (or your “neighbors”), as these behaviors yield powerful relationship and healing outcomes. Remember, Earned Secure Attachment refers to […]
This list of 100 Attachment and Attunement Needs is inspired by Attachment Theory and Emotionally Focused Therapy. Your goal with this Wisdom Tool is to identify then practice these behaviors to build “Earned Secure Attachments” and Attunement with each other (or your “neighbors”), as these behaviors yield powerful relationship and healing outcomes. Remember, Earned Secure Attachment refers to […]
This list of 100 Attachment and Attunement Needs is inspired by Attachment Theory and Emotionally Focused Therapy. Your goal with this Wisdom Tool is to identify then practice these behaviors to build “Earned Secure Attachments” and Attunement with each other (or your “neighbors”), as these behaviors yield powerful relationship and healing outcomes. Remember, Earned Secure Attachment refers to […]
Flavor 31 – Self-Control (Enkrateia) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence, and Significance: Self-Control (or Enkrateia in Greek), the last of the nine Fruit of the Spirit, is the end result of a very fruitful process of growth. Just like the previous eight fruits of the Spirit, Self-Control is deeply rooted in […]
Flavor #30: Peace (Shalom; Eirene) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence, and Significance: Peace encompasses more than the absence of conflict. The Hebrew word Shalom points to completeness, wholeness, well-being, and prosperity; a state where all aspects of life are in harmony. Similarly, the Greek term Eirene conveys tranquility and restfulness. Together, these terms illustrate that true peace […]
Flavor #29: Gentleness/Emotional Regulation (Prautes) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence, and Significance: The Greek term Prautes, often translated as “gentleness,” embodies strength under control. According to Aristotle, Prautes represents the mean between excessive anger and a complete lack of it, signifying the ability to express anger appropriately, at the right time, in the […]
Flavor #28: Skilled Outcomes (Epiginosko; Prasso; Brabeion/Stephanos) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) 1. Meaning, Essence, and Significance: Skilled Outcomes, especially in love and relational restoration, are grounded in the Greek term Epiginosko: a deep, experiential understanding born from observation, reflection, and intentional action. It moves beyond mere awareness to a comprehensive knowledge (#3) […]
Flavor #27: Skilled Behavior (Ra’ah; Horao; Samar; Oikodomeo; Kun; Scholazo) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence, and Significance: Skilled behavior is reflected in your ability to “paint into your reality” attentiveness, perception (#10), deep understanding (#20) and practical action (#25), which are necessary qualities to fulfill your responsibilities with wisdom, skill and […]
Flavor #26: Discipline (Musar; Energes; Hypomone) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence, and Significance: The Hebrew term Musar encompasses discipline, instruction, and correction. It implies guidance aimed at your moral and ethical development and is often associated with fatherly correction intended to impart wisdom (#1) and character (#7). In the Book of Proverbs, Musar […]
Flavor #25: Practical Action (Sophia; Ergon) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence, and Significance: The Greek term Sophia embodies wisdom that integrates both practical skill and profound insight. It represents wisdom graciously given by God, enabling you to discern what choices and actions are best for you and in your interaction(s) […]
Flavor #23: Prudence (Ormah; Prudentia) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, essence, and significance? Prudence, rooted in the Hebrew term ‘Ormah, is the positive outcome of integrating and applying Discretion (#16), Wisdom (#1), Intelligence (#13), and Reason (#12). When these virtues are combined and put into practice, they enable you to develop thoughtful strategies that […]
Flavor #22: Humility (Tsana; Tapeinos) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Humility, as expressed by the Hebrew term Tsana, signifies modesty and a humble demeanor, emphasizing a person’s recognition of their limitations and a submissive attitude, particularly in relation to God. The Greek term Tapeinos denotes a state of lowliness or humility, often […]
Flavor #21: Compassion (Splanchnizomai; Splanchnon) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, essence, and significance: Compassion is a visceral, emotional and behavioral response that compels you to act to alleviate the suffering experience of another. The Greek term Splanchnizomai is derived from Splanchnon, which is the medical term for the internal organs in your viscera, […]
Flavor #20: Understanding (Binah; Tebunah; Sekel; Syniemi) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, essence, and significance: Understanding is the ability to perceive the deeper meaning behind information, discerning patterns and insights that lead to wise behavior. The Hebrew term Binah refers to discernment (#11) and comprehension, enabling one to distinguish between nuances. Tebunah denotes deep […]
Flavor #19: Creativity (Bara; Asah; Tob; Charis) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, essence, and significance: Creativity mirrors divine action, embodying the act of crafting intelligent (#13) and intentional experiences of beauty, goodness and connection. The Hebrew term Bara speaks of your engagement in creative activity where the outcome brings something into existence that […]
Flavor #18: Righteousness (Saddiyq; Sedeq) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, essence, and significance: Righteousness, rooted in the Hebrew terms Saddiyq and Sedeq, embodies the qualities of justice (#17), integrity (#14), honesty and moral behavior. Righteousness signifies unwavering adherence to ethical principles and fairness, by aspiring to reflect God’s positive character in one’s behavior as […]
Flavor #17: Justice (Mishpat; Dike) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Justice, explained by the Hebrew term Mishpat, embodies fairness, equity, and the proper administration of principles and law. It encompasses the entire judicial process: from establishing laws to executing judgments and reflects a societal commitment to righteousness and impartiality. In Greek thought, Dike represents […]
Flavor #16: Discretion (Sekel; Mezimmah; Tebunah) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Discretion embodies the judicious application of knowledge, enabling you to make decisions with prudence (#23), insight and tact. The Hebrew term Sekel refers to intelligence (#13) and success, emphasizing discernment that guides your ability to make careful and thoughtful actions […]
Flavor #15: Moral Cognition (Da’at; Hakam; Biyn; Aisthesis; Arete) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Moral cognition is the capacity to discern and choose right over wrong, integrating knowledge (#3), wisdom, and ethical sensitivity. The Hebrew term Da’at denotes deep, experiential knowledge that informs your moral judgment. Hakam refers to moral sensitivity, […]
Flavor #13: Intelligence (Hokma; Sakal; Biyn) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Intelligence is more than your cognitions and cognitive ability at work; it embodies assessing situations and tasks, determining what’s the best next step to take, then doing just that, to obtain the best of all […]
Flavor #12: Reason (Logos; Dianoia) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Reason is the product and gift of discourse, thoughtful engagement (#8) and discernment (#11). The Greek term Logos encompasses “word,” “speech,” and “principle,” and in Greek philosophy, Logos involved reflecting, mediating, and speaking with purpose, where emotions and truth are […]
Flavor #11: Discernment (Biyn; Tebunah) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Discernment is the ability to perceive and distinguish between different elements, leading to informed decisions. The Hebrew term Biyn conveys the act of mentally separating or distinguishing, enabling you to understand and consider matters deeply. Tebunah refers to intelligence or insight derived […]
Flavor #10: Perception (Sekel; Aisthanomai) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Perception involves discerning and understanding beyond surface appearances. The Hebrew term Sekel denotes intelligence and insight, emphasizing prudence and wisdom that leads to success. In the Greek, Aisthanomai refers to Perception being an intuitive knowledge, but it is also a knowledge gained […]
Flavor #9: Learning (Leqach; Ozen; Shamar) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Learning transcends information acquisition, and points toward your engagement in an active, transformative process. The Hebrew term Leqach refers to instruction or teaching, emphasizing the importance of internalizing wisdom. Ozen, meaning “ear,” signifies attentive listening (#4), highlighting that true […]
Flavor #8: Thinking (Esah; Boule; Phronesis) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Thinking is more than mental activity; it embodies deliberate and purposeful reflection. The Hebrew term Esah signifies it’s composed of counsel and advice, emphasizing thoughtful planning and prudence. Similarly, the Greek word Boule denotes intentional counsel or purpose, reflecting decisions […]
Flavor #7: Character (Charakter; Leb; Tebunah) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Character embodies the essence of who we are, especially when unobserved. In the New Testament, the Greek word Charakter signifies an exact imprint or precise reproduction, illustrating how your character reflects your inner values. Leb refers to the heart, the […]
Flavor #6: Empathy (Empatheia; Hanan; Hesed) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Empathy is the profound ability to deeply understand and share the feelings of another. In Greek, Empatheia originally denoted physical affection or passion, but in modern usage, it refers to the capacity to emotionally understand and connect deeply with […]
Flavor #4: Listening (Ozen; Shama; Akouo) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Listening transcends auditory perception; it embodies active engagement and responsiveness. The Hebrew term Ozen refers to the ear, the organ of hearing. Shama extends this concept to imply hearing with attention, understanding, and obedience. In the New Testament, the Greek word Akouo conveys hearing […]
Flavor #3: Knowledge (Da’at; Ginosko; Epiginosko; Oida) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Knowledge in biblical terms transcends mere information; it embodies personal, experiential, and relational understanding. The Hebrew term Da’at signifies a contemplative wisdom rooted in reverence for God, as God provides clarity with my morals and anchors my spirituality […]
Flavor #2: Love (Ahab; Agapao) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: In the Bible, “Love” depicts specific and focused behavior that creates self and other care, in addition to resulting in the development of profound emotional bonds with others. The Hebrew term Ahab describes deep affection and desire for closeness, evident […]
Flavor #1: Wisdom (Hakam, Hokma, Sekel, Sophia) (Complete list and links to the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) Meaning, Essence and Significance: Wisdom transcends the mere gaining of knowledge; it embodies skillful living that demonstrates you know what to do when the situation you’re in requires the right response. In Hebrew, Hokma refers to both practical skills and intellectual insight, […]
(Complete list and links of the 31 Flavors of Wisdom) “If you are wise, your wisdom will reward you…” Proverbs 9:12 (TNIV) “Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food” – Hippocrates, the Father of Medicine While doing research in the Book of Proverbs on the subject of Wisdom (in addition to the Bible as […]
Thanks for reading the two previous posts, “So what did you learn at your conference?” (Day 1 of 3) and (Day 2 of 3), which highlighted what I learned at the 21st Annual Counseling Skills conference in Dallas, Tx, over September 24th – 26th. As mentioned in the previous posts, I wanted to share a few […]
I attended the 21st Annual Counseling Skills Conference in Dallas this past week (Sept. 24th – 26th) and I wanted to share a few of the helpful things I picked up and learned from the speakers. My hope is to integrate these points into my life personally and professionally, and my hope is that you may […]
Welcome back NFL! As I was watched the Professional Football Hall of Fame induction ceremonies last night, this post came to mind (and thank you Hall of Famer Charles Haley for encouraging teammates to get help when they need it!): Vince Lombardi was probably one of the greatest Head Football Coaches in the history of […]
Thank you for reading Couples Who Recover (Part 1 of 2). Below are a few characteristics and practices that Recovering Couples consider important and helpful as they work toward becoming stronger people who are creating a stronger relationship. “Couples Who Recover” (“CR”) live by their identified values, which helps them to create boundaries that help them […]
Below are a few characteristics and practices that Recovering Couples consider important and helpful as they work toward becoming stronger people who are creating a stronger relationship. Couples who Recover (“CR”) work hard to create safe moments and calm between them, because they realize their discussions facilitate solutions when they are in their adult ego […]
Something deep within tells me this just isn’t going to end very well. Would you agree? And so it is with the use of “The Killer D’s” (to be offset by the Empowering E’s). The Killer D’s are words that begin with the letter “D” and describe processes that I see in my counseling office […]
(An excerpt from Cultivating Love: When Secrets Surface by Dr Ken McGill) Prize is one of the 10 descriptors of Agape, the unique form of love that our Higher Power helps us to develop for our personal benefit and subsequently to be freely, maturely and respectfully demonstrated with others Prize (Brabeion and Stephanos – NT): […]
(An excerpt from Cultivating Love: When Secrets Surface by Dr Ken McGill) Recorded below are some thoughts on 1 Corinthians 13:4-8a. I suggest these to you right now because in light of what you both have experienced, love has been and will always be the answer, the goal, the destination, the focus and the solution. […]